A Little Bit EACH day
In an effort to keep my small apartment clean, I constantly read articles with tips that always suggest doing a little bit every day. Taking care of incoming mail as you enter your home so it doesn't clutter, sweeping and mopping on a certain day each week and cleaning all dishes in the kitchen sink before you go to sleep. But why not think the same way with our relationships?
As a wedding officiant and pre-marital counselor I pride myself in working with couples to find ways to strengthen their relationships. Many times, one of the pair gets frustrated searching for ways to make grand gestures of their love and care. But most of the time, small gestures are not only more appreciated, but easier to accomplish. For those who have gone through counseling with me, you know that I am a big fan of Gary Chapman's 5 Love Languages. We all have a way we like to receive love and that way may be (well, most likely IS) different than our partner's. Once you find out your Love Language, Gary Chapman offers a number of ideas of things your partner can do to better speak your language. And you can also do the same. I know, not rocket science, but again small gestures can reap great rewards!
My awesome parents will celebrate their 49th wedding anniversary next month. Y'all, 49 years! It's a long time. In the spirit of full disclosure, my parents do fight and disagree. They raise their voices a lot and I learned how to curse and use expletives from them (thanks, parents!) However, the love in their relationship is strong and apparent. I recently asked them both if they felt loved. And without hesitation they said yes. When I asked HOW they knew, they said,
"He tells me"
"She's concerned about me"
"He's generous and kind"
"She opened up some pistachios for me"
"We constantly do things for each other"
We live in a very busy world. Our calendars are full with work and play, alone time, couple time and social time with family and friends. In an effort to do little things to strengthen our romantic relationships, here are some suggestions of things that can be done every day.
1. Tell your GF, BF or spouse that you love them.
2. If your partner has a full to-do list, ask if you can handle one of their tasks.
3. If your partner has a lower clean & tidy tolerance, pick up after yourself more regularly.
4. If your partner tends to cook most meals, offer to cook. Or if cooking is not in your skill set, order food in or take your GF, BF or spouse out to dinner!
5. Most of us love surprises. So buy a small gift to show you care. Flowers, cologne, their favorite dessert...
6. Offer to give your GF, BF or spouse a 15-minute back rub or foot massage.
Do any of these sound good to you? Anything you may want to offer your partner? Do you have any suggestions to add to the list? How do you feel loved? How can you better show love to your partner? Please feel free to comment or share below.