5 Signs of a Calm Bride or Groom
Zen and the art of wedding planning. Calm, cool, and collected. Does this sound like you? Or something like a fairy tale?
What are the 5 signs of a calm bride or groom, you ask?
Picture this: you’re knee-deep in wedding preparations, and your to-do list seems to grow longer with every passing day. There is an endless stream of messages from vendors, and family members. It seems like every conversation with your partner is about the wedding.
This can easily up your stress levels! But not you, you’ve embraced your inner Zen. You are able to handle the complexities of wedding planning with ease and grace!
I know, I know this may sound like a pipe dream. Your planning process is nothing like that. However, here are few tips to get you there.
1. Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff
The first and most unmistakable sign of a calm marrier is that you’re not fretting over every minor detail.
This is not to say that details aren’t important, because they absolutely are. But the difference is, you don’t let the details take over! You know how to embrace imperfections without sacrificing your overall vision and goals. You also know the power of pivot.
You may have your heart set on something that cannot happen. But perhaps it’s the universe setting you up for something better. In your heart and mind, you know that the most important thing about your wedding is getting married. I know I am biased here. I’ve reminded many a couple that the wedding day is successful if you are MARRIED at the end of the day. Because of this, you don’t let trivial details overshadow that.
Do your best to maintain perspective throughout the wedding planning process. Understand that minor hiccups are inevitable and not worth getting worked up over in the grand scheme of things.
2. Be a Master at Delegation
Rather than trying to do everything yourself, you’re comfortable delegating tasks. Entrusting friends, family members, or wedding vendors to complete tasks on the to do list. That way you can focus on what only you (& your partner) can do.
You know that it takes a village to create something meaningful and special. Therefore you are more than happy to get the people you trust to get involved. I’m sure there will be plenty of people asking if they can help. Accept it when and where you can.
Having said this, you also know that not everyone can do things the same way as you do. So you may need to take the time to properly assign a tasks to the right person. As well as create a timeline and check-in.
3. Prioritize Self-Care
You love yourself enough to take time for yourself. While this can be helpful all the time, it comes in super handy as you prepare for your wedding.
It’s important to prioritize things that are good for your mind and body. Whether it be a movie night with friends, a bubble bath with your partner, a yoga session, or a relaxing massage all by yourself.
While we may not normally think about it, self-care also involves saying no. Declining invitations or experiences that just don’t bring you joy.
Someone asks you to come to a birthday that will be at a club? If that’s not your vibe - say no. You can always offer something more to your taste at a later date.
4. Trust Yourself and your Vendors
You have confidence in your decision-making abilities and trust your instincts. This includes choosing vendors, making design choices, and handling wedding-related matters.
Decision making in life can be a challenge, but it’s intensified during the wedding process. I mean, you are prepping for one day and you want to make sure everything is just right. Dr. Ellen Langer, author & professor of psychology preaches it's not about making the right decision, but “making the decision right.” So once you make the best choice of a dress or suit, don’t agonize over whether or not it was the right one. But instead get a great pair of shoes to match. A tie that complements, and jewelry that looks great with the neckline. Trust your decisions and make the best of the situation. That doesn’t mean settling, it means trusting yourself.
The same goes for your vendors. You’ve hired and chosen you planner, florist, photographers, DJ and officiant. Your decisions were not based on the cost alone, although it probably affected your decision. Remember that you chose them mostly because you trust them, value their opinions and have faith in their expertise. So make sure they know what you want and trust them to execute for you.
5. Be Present in the Moment & Excited for the Future
Of course, you relish the present moment, but you also feel excited about the future. I know it’s a bit to juggle, but it’s important to balance the two.
Sure, you are planning a very cool wedding day, so you should aim to cultivate an attitude of gratitude and calm throughout the wedding planning process. That means appreciating the love and support of your friends and family, as well as taking the opportunity to celebrate your union. There is something special about savoring each moment, and cherishing your engagement.
However, what about the day AFTER the wedding? You’re planning an amazing day (or series of days!) so there may be some sadness or let down once it’s over. It’s important to look forward to something. Hopefully you’re eager to spend the rest of your days with the love of your life. Therefore you’re looking forward to planning an incredible journey together.
But what does that look like? It could be a trip or honeymoon, or getting a joint saving account or credit card. Perhaps it’s moving in together and creating a space that’s truly OURS.
In the grand scheme of things, your wedding day is just the beginning of an exciting new chapter. However, even with so much unknown, you will be sure to do it all together!
Were any of these a-ha moments for you? Do you feel calmer just considering these ideas? Anything you are excited to try? Are there tips you feel are missing that you want to share? The comment section is always open. Or feel free to EMAIL ME if you need to guidance on having a Zen Wedding!