Gratituesday 8.4.20 - In Limbo

There have been so many times in my life when I have not felt settled. Moving across country twice, getting my masters degree later in life, changing careers and starting over…again. Over the past 4 years, I’ve worked hard to create a stable home and career, but now due to COVID and a renovation project that’s STILL not complete, I’m back in limbo.

For someone who likes to plan and dislikes surprises, this is a very frustrating place to be. I am constantly asked when the world will re-open. When will business return to normal? I do appreciate colleagues valuing my opinion, however I really have no idea. There are people who are excited by the unknown. I am not one of those people.

I am in the middle of a 90-day meditation practice lead by the New York Zen Center. While I am not always successful with Dogen’s ‘continuous practice,’ I have been better about being present on a daily basis. I think the best thing to balance this feeling of being in limbo is adding some weight and dedication to grounding. For those who take my regular yoga class, be prepared for a slow, centering practice on Thursday evening. (If you’re interested in joining, let me know, and I’ll send you the link!)

In the meantime, let’s reflect on the good things, and be clear about our intentions for the future. Care to join me? Good. Let’s go.

Gratitudes

1. Being able to make a delicious meal from random things in my kitchen

2. Boating on the south shore of LI and practicing yoga outside

3. Physically distanced time with friends (with wine!)

4. Living in a beautiful city and state

5. My AC and fans - and open windows today!

Victories

1. Booking 1 new wedding for next year

2. A negative COVID test (but waited for my results for over 2 weeks!)

3. Finally hanging some artwork & organizing my bedroom

4. 139 days of Spanish lessons on Duolingo

5. Paper-wrapped meat options from the butcher at Whole Foods

Desires

1. A clean and organized home

2. A mirror and 2 nightstands in the bedroom

3. For my neighbor to stop smoking pot directly under my window in the middle of the night (for realz!)

4. A mani-pedi

5. To not only read, but finish reading it